Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Decisions...

I fight for what I love.

If one thing stays constant in my life it is the above statement. That part of me never changes, no matter how "mature" or "responsible" I become. I fight for the things that I love.

I had a talk today with the president-elect of the SEC. I did not talk to Ameer sadly. Ameer was not allowed to talk, so instead I was told by the president-elect that I was not chosen because the decision makers did not want to fill the position. There are a million ways to take this statement and if I wanted to I could choose to form a conspiracy theory that would make all those area 51 and WTC 7 guys look like suits. But here is how I am going to take it...

I was humbled today.

I was brought down a notch because for the past year I believed a chair position was waiting for me. Most people around me would agree that my position all along was not if I was going to be chair but what chair would I run for. This assumption of mine was never questioned. It was questioned today.

So now I go back to the drawing board. Tonight I am going to watch Big Fish, but not as a member of the film committee. I'm going to wait in line and flash my student ID because for the next week I am not going to be a part of the SEC. There is no other way to put this, this is 50% whiny-boy protest and 50% head-cleaning time. I can't separate the two from each other. When I return next Thursday I will apply, once more, for the position of film chair. To all of you reading this, I would appreciate if more film committee members with strong ideas run for the chair position. There's a good four or five of you who have the ability there to be a great chair.

I told the president-elect that today I felt like I was dumped. I still have that feeling. I haven't had a dry eye all day and it's starting to hurt. But, in spite of it all, I love film, I love the film committee, I love the people who make up the SEC, and because of that love, I'm going to fight to keep it.

While I'm on the subject of love...

I rarely do this, and I really should do more of it in case she forgets.

I declare my love for you Megan, and I declare my intent to keep on fighting for that love.



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